You can teach an elephant old tricks.
Add a slice of lemon and an ounce of breakfast.
Anyway, enough about my life, let's talk about Bargle Snagfist's life. The story began four years ago at a truck stop in Louisiana, in the southern United States of America circa 2000, A.D. in the year of Our Lord...
Bargle Snagfist was a normal man, with the stature and appearence of an abnormal man. One day Bargle was at a truckstop, waiting for a truck to stop. A giant bird, approximately the size of a small airplane or a giant bird, swooped down and ate him. Bargle's life long quest to become an international celebrity was tragically cut short that day--however, his slightly-less-than-life-long secondary quest to be eaten by a huge friggin' bird was achieved.
Eat More, Save Less!
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